Invitation to Participate - Prosci's 2009 Change Management Benchmarking Study

Prosci and the Change Management Learning Center announced the launch of the worldwide 2009 Best Practices in Change Management study. Based on past performance, more than 400 organizations from 59 countries are expected to participate.

"The 2009 study will be one of the most comprehensive benchmarking studies in the world on managing the people side of change," states Jeff Hiatt, CEO of Prosci. "The purpose of this research study is to determine the ingredients for successful change in business and government."

Participation in the benchmarking study is free and open to anyone currently involved in a major change initiative or having recently completed a change project. Participants must be change sponsors or change leaders on the project. Participants will receive a complimentary copy of the final published report.

The study is available as of December 2nd, 2008 and will run for six weeks. Participation is on a first-come, first-served basis. To learn more about participating in Prosci's 2009 Benchmarking study, please email changemanagement@prosci.com or go to www.change-management.com/cm-study-2009.htm .

Mark Connelly - Change Management Coach, Business & Life Coach, Psychologist - Cape Town

What's possible in your life?

If your heart was to stop beating medics might plunge a long needle into your heart to inject adrenalin and get it going again. Sometimes in life we just need that shot in the arm, or a kick on the backside to get us going.

I'm no medic. In fact it was 'Pulp Fiction' that reminded me of the adrenalin injection to the heart. Hardly ER or even Gray's Anatomy! I know that many of us reach a place of despondancy and hopelessness in our lives - when the way forward is not clear and the change that's needed is just too much. I know because I've been there. Drastic action is required. A shot of adrenalin to the heart.

When it's fear and uncertainty that stop us it's not adrenalin that's needed. It's inspiration. Inspiration - an interesting word that's defined as 'the act of breathing in'. Other words with the same sort of meaning include arousal, awakening, brainstorm, creativity, elevation, encouragement, enthusiasm, exaltation, illumination, impulse, incentive, insight, motivation, revelation, spark, stimulation, and vision. You get the idea.

I was recently introduced to a video of a musician by the name of Tony Melendez. In fact I'm not going to tell you about it. I'd rather you watched it yourself.



When you've seen the video you may want to find out more about Tony Melendez here (see his performance with the Pope!)

I've seen and heard many inspiring people before. I'm sure you have too. People who have endured great hardship and get to tell the tale. In this case the injection of inspiration includes a stimulant called 'hope'. When I see how other people live in the same world I inhabit, and find ways to make it work, it gives me hope that anything is possible. Even Elisabeth Kubler-Ross included hope in her five stage model of change. This hope is the belief that there will be a positive end to the change and that there is some meaning that will eventually be learned from the experience. Hope is essential in times of change. Hope can give us the inspiration that change in our life is possible. That life is possible.

And I'd far rather watch Tony Melendez than get a kick in the backside. Or a needle to my heart, thank you!

Mark Connelly - Change Management Coach, Business & Life Coach, Psychologist - Cape Town

Racial tolerance spreads

Before he won Survivor Fiji, I remember Earl Cole talking about his friendship with Yau-Man Chan. He was impressed that a black man and a Malaysian man could form such a close bond - an unlikely alliance in his world.

Our deepest beliefs about the world, about each other, about money, and about ourselves are all open to the possibility of change. Often it takes an event, like Survivor, to challenge our convictions. But if we open ourselves to the possibility that the way we understand the world is not the only way, then we open ourselves to endless possibilities.

A recent New York Times article caught my attention because of its focus on possibility. Race and cultural difference is always on the agenda in South Africa, and the spread of trust between races, rather than suspicion, is a challenging concept for change.

...mutual trust between members of different races can catch on just as quickly, and spread just as fast, as suspicion.

In some new studies, psychologists have been able to establish a close relationship between diverse pairs — black and white, Latino and Asian, black and Latino — in a matter of hours. That relationship immediately reduces conscious and unconscious bias in both people, and also significantly reduces prejudice toward the other group in each individual’s close friends.

This extended-contact effect, as it is called, travels like a benign virus through an entire peer group, counteracting subtle or not so subtle mistrust.

“It’s important to remember that implicit biases are out there, absolutely; but I think that that’s only half the story,” said Linda R. Tropp, an associate professor of psychology at the University of Massachusetts. “With broader changes in the society at large, people can also become more willing to reach across racial boundaries, and that goes for both minorities and whites.”

Read the article here...

Change may happen slowly in our lives. And that's ok. We can open ourselves to the possibility of that change by focusing on what we want more of in our lives rather than on what we don't want. The most incredible possibilities are available if we open our minds to that possibility!

Mark Connelly - Change Mangagement Coach, Business & Life Coach, Psychologist - Cape Town

Change quotes

"Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans; that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one's favour, all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it. Begin it now".
Goethe

Mark Connelly - Change Management Coach, Business & Life Coach, Psychologist - Cape Town

Change has come to America

"It's been a long time coming, but tonight, because of what we did on this day, in this election, at this defining moment, change has come to America." Barack Obama said these words on Tuesday evening in Grant Park as he celebrated being elected president of the United States.

The message of Change, and the message of hope has been central to Obama's campaign. Just look at his website to get a glimpse of the power of this message.

Politicians promise change all the time - there's nothing new there. So from a political perspective we wait and allow American leaders the opportunity to create the change they talk about.

Giving people a reason to want change is a time honored technique in change management strategy. It's sometimes called the 'burning platform'. People will jump when there's good enough reason to do so. The George Bush era may have done this for many Americans. Anything is possible if we believe it is necessary.

Giving yourself a compelling reason is a great way to begin change. It helps put change into perspective. Start with a simple list. Draw 2 columns on a page. At the top of one column write "what I will gain if I make the change" and write a list of all the things you will gain from the change. At the top of the other column write "what I will lose if I don't make the change", and write that list. Make it painful. You must feel it.

Sometimes this is enough! Focusing on what you will gain from the change OR on what you stand to lose can be enough motivation. Personally I like to stick with the good stuff and be motivated by what I can gain.

Often though a "burning platform" can be just what we need to give us a push. What's your "burning platform"? Choose one or two points from your "what I will lose" list and set fire to them. NO! Not literally! Write them down and make another list, this time of the effects that losing this will have on you, your work life, your personal life, and the effect it will have on others. Are we getting hot?

So if you don't make a change and you stand to lose your car, the effects might include:

• Walking everywhere
  
• Relying on public transport
• Getting to work/meetings will be difficult; you'll be more stressed; even hot and smelly!
  
• You might be late for appointments; people may see you as unreliable; you could lose your job.
• No car for family shopping or family outings.

You get the idea I'm sure. Push it to the limit. Make it hurt. Make it really burn. This could give you the edge you need to make a decision and embrace change.

Mark Connelly - Change Management Coach, Life Coach, Psychologist - Cape Town

Imagine laughter

It's understandable that you may be feeling gloomy these days. The world economy is turning and you may be feeling forced to make changes in lifestyle that you didn't predict. You are not alone!

Happiness may seem a distant memory, but the good news is that you can control the way you feel. Science is discovering evidence that shows we can change our feelings. In an article I recently read the simple act of imagining a different emotion triggers brain activity; and research indicates that imagining laughter reduces sadness. Wow! Here's an excerpt from the article:

In 2004, scientists at Bowling Green State University in Ohio tested for that path when they studied people's ability to control their own emotions. Using the same brain scanning technique as Davidson, the psychologists reported that even when people simply imagined emotions, their thoughts triggered mood-related neuronal activity.

When subjects imagined laughter, their left-brain "happiness" circuits were stimulated and they reported a reduction in sadness. When they imagined crying, their right-brain negative emotional circuits were triggered, and they reported a decrease in happiness.

While psychologists continue to try to nail down the causal relationships between mood and brain activity, what has become increasingly clear is that to some extent human beings can affect - even control - the plasticity of their own brains.

"Happiness researchers have learned a great deal about how people can become happier and stay happier," said U.C.-Riverside's Lyubomirsky. "Of course, I wouldn't call it "training our brains,' but training ourselves - that is, learning to practice certain ways of thinking and behaving, like expressing gratitude, following intrinsic life goals, practicing optimism, investing in relationships - all of which, we now have scientific evidence for, increase our happiness."

Read the full article here.

When we're feeling down and unhappy the hardest thing to do is think about changing our 'state' of mind. But it strikes me that this is an option that's easy to do. You don't even have to committ to making yourself happier. Try it now:

1. Imagine someone laughing for at least 15 seconds
   
2. Visualise what you see and hear
   
3. Honestly assess how you feel.
4. Do it again!
   

There's nothing wrong with feeling sad. Finding ways to move out of this whenever you can empowers you - and that might just feel good!

Change Quotes

"He who has a 'why' to live, can bear with almost any 'how'."

- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)

Fun-damental to Change

Fundamentals of change

Imagine for a moment that you were given a choice about how you could face your worst idea of change. Whoa! Hang on a minute. You don't need to imagine this - it's real. You do have a choice. Why choose to make your 'change' a dark and scary place that you fear to walk through when you could choose to turn it into a funfair? Ok, so I am asking you to use your imagination a little bit!

I would choose a funfair over that dark, scary place any day - wouldn't you? If you know you are facing a change ask yourself "How can I deal with this change AND have fun?" or "How can I deal with this change AND learn something new?" The answer does not come easily - this is hard work. In asking and answering this kind of question you are choosing a different experience of the change, instead of going into it blindly and expecting the worst.

Fundamental tip: find the fun in the change you are expecting. Make a funfair of it; lots to explore, lots to learn, some real fear - but a long lasting memory that you would buy a ticket to experience again.

Explore. Dream. Discover.

A literary minded client considering change in his life quoted Samuel Johnson the other evening:

"He is no wise man who will quit a certainty for an uncertainty." - Samuel Johnson

It makes sense doesn't it? Stick with what you know or be labeled a fool. That's enough to make you hesitate.

In a particularly explosive literary moment I countered with the following (actually I had to look it up on the Internet, but I had the jist of it):

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." - Mark Twain

Two equally brilliant world views. One more inviting of change.

Have a great day.

Take control of your life

Fundamentals of Change.
When you know the fundamentals of change, and incorporate these into your world view, you are empowered to deal with and cope with change.

Coping with change begins with the way we understand what is happening. There is a wonderful concept known as the 'locus of control' that basically says we either believe that life happens to us, and we have little or no control over what happens, OR that we are in control of our lives, and the decisions we make and the actions we take affect what happens to us.

"Things happen to me" OR "I can influence what happens"

Where would you place yourself most of the time?

The problem with dealing with change when your world view is that life happens to you is that you end up feeling helpless, and a little bit like a victim. OK, a lot like a victim! There is very little you can do and so you accept your fate. Not happily though. Actually you're probably pretty grumpy. And Change is never a good thing.

Facing change believing that you can have an influence on what happens, or on your emotional reaction to the change, immediately puts you into a different frame of mind. The way to do this is to begin asking yourself questions. A question such as "How can I move through this change and learn from it?" or "What can I do to make this change work for me?" sets your brain looking for answers. That's why I love questions so much. They force you to look for answers. So as long as you are asking questions that bring you positive answers you are on your way.

Practice thinking about how you might benefit from times of change. I once read a book called "Under the Dragon's wing" by Lin Zimbler. She lived with Multiple Sclerosis and said this:

"For those who dare to brave the fearsomeness of the Dragon there is always a gift to be found under its wings. The courage to face the Dragon is commensurate with preciousness of the gift."

Lin Zimbler, in 1996, before her death.

There is always a gift to be found. Even in the hardest of times it is possible to look for ways you can grow. Taking this action puts you in control - not the change.

Fundamentals of Change

fun·da·men·tal (fnd-mntl)adj.

1.

a. Of or relating to the foundation or base; elementary.

b. Forming or serving as an essential component.

c. Of great significance or entailing major change.

Change of any kind is often a venture into the unknown. And it is this alone that causes many of us to hesitate, or even refuse, to move - choosing instead to hold on to what we already know. Fortunately, much is known about the process of change. This knowledge has been learned by those who have ventured forward before us and has often been learned the hard way, through experience and reflection. Although the territory of your journey will be different to mine, much is known about the map that we both hold. This knowledge is known as the fundamentals of change and is the subject of this series. When you know the fundamentals of change, and incorporate these into your world view, you are empowered to deal with and cope with change.

The intention behind the Fundamentals of Change series is to enable and empower you with important things you should know about change before you begin the journey. Let's begin.

Part 1 to follow

Believe and expect that you can change

There's nothing like an inspiring song to really get you going. And isn't it strange how years later you can listen to the song and feel the power of it all over again? I was a student in South Africa when Eddy Grant released Gimme Hope Joanna and I remember playing it loudly in my car (the best sound I had at the time was a tape deck installed in my car). South Africa was not an easy place politically at the end of the eighties and songs like this inspired me and gave me a belief that change was possible. The fact that I was unaware the song had been banned by the South African apartheid government and I was playing it liberally only makes it that much sweeter now!

It is not enough to just have facts about the change that lies ahead. To really connect with the changes we face there also has to be a strong belief and expectation that we can change. In other words there has to be hope. Often it is someone else who is able to give us the belief and expectation, the hope, that we can change. Eddy Grant sang about it and I believe that holding the hope that my clients are able to change is an essential part of my work. At times when things seem hope-less it is warming and inspiring to find someone who is hope-full. Someone who holds hope. For you.

You can develop hope-fullness for yourself by learning to notice what is working around you, rather than what is broken. Even in really difficult times, or when change is forced on you, it is possible to hold hope. This is done by exploring the different possibilities and choosing a way forward, and moving towards it with the belief and expectation that it can become a new reality.

Or, like me, discover and play a meaning-full song, one that inspires hope, and gets you through the tough hours.

Courage of Change

God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me. - Author Unknown

Create Awareness for a Change

In 1988 I bought my first car, a 1975 Fiat 128 Rally. It was second hand and cost me all of R2000. The car taught me a lot about myself, especially patience. You see, even though the car was generally outstanding the one thing that worked erratically was the fuel indicator. So, from time to time, I would find myself with an abundance of air in my tank and forced to casually sidle over to the side of the road to seek a friendly petrol station that could sell me petrol and some kind of container to carry it in. Not always an easy task.

There was a unique trick that I had to learn to get the car going again. It was not enough to simply pour petrol into the tank. Once this was done the engine would turn and turn until I popped the bonnet, opened the carburettor and quenched its thirst with a drop of petrol into this mysterious contraption. All I knew was that it worked and therefore I was prepared for it. I was usually reasonably calm. I knew what to do and learned to be incredibly efficient in this process.

Unlike my reaction to my first motorbike. Okay, I loved that bike too. A 1982 Suzuki GSX 250 it was my main transport for at least two years. But this bike had a habit of refusing to start when it was wet. Most bikers know days when you set off in warm sunshine and then have to ride home at the end of the day in the pouring rain. Inevitably my bike would stop running and refuse to start again. I clearly remember one night in the rain cursing and kicking the bike when it refused to start. I lost it completely before sadly conceding defeat and walking home in a puddle.

Back then I didn't know why I reacted so differently in two frustrating situations. Since then I have done my homework and have learned about myself, my reactions, my emotions. Even better, I've learned what I can do to empower myself to understand and control my emotions. If I can learn to do this then believe me you can do it to. Doing change always starts with self awareness. Go here to start this process with a free questionnaire that tells you what your 5 main strengths are. Register and start with the VIA Signature Strengths Questionnaire, and then have some fun with the other questionnaires. Learning about yourself can be fun when you're not in the rain kicking a soggy Suzuki.

If Nothing Ever Changed...

I guess there is plenty to learn about change using the metaphor of the butterfly - it is the ultimate change after all. You start off life as a caterpillar, do some funky stuff in a pupa, and emerge to really spread your wings and fly. Now, I don't know much about lepidoptera (it's Greek to me) but you must admit caterpillars do seem to handle forced change pretty well.

Butterfly World, near Stellenbosch, is an awesome place. It's a different world, with hundreds of varieties of butterflies hatching and fluttering about in this tropical (read humid) atmosphere.

If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies. ~Author Unknown.

The thing that strikes me is that there are so many different types of butterflies. There is no mold for change, it will always be a different experience for each of us, and we don't all emerge looking the same. Accepting change may lead you to something wonderful and unexpected.



This is not just about change, this is about transition. In a conversation today I was reminded that I do transition. I appreciate the journey from a current place to another way of being, with all the learning along the way. I don't believe transition is given enough attention, especially in organisational change. In my experience the starting point for change in many organisations is the butterfly, and if you can't be that then you are 'not committed'. There's not much thought given to the transition, the journey, that we must take before we can inhabit the new space.

If nothing ever changed, there'd be no butterflies... Perhaps a way forward is to practice looking for 'the best of' in change. Ask different questions. What could you be? How would you like to emerge? What can you do now to ensure that happens?

Surf's Up for Change

I did an interview today about change for Men's Health magazine - yup, men do do change too. (Could that be a song title?) The joke of course is that in the pages of Men's Health men take on change as long as there is sex every day and built abs as a bonus! Anyway I digress - quite a lot actually.

While I was talking about change I was reminded of a metaphor I've used to describe change. Surfing.

Nope, I've never been a surfer. Believe me, I would not be able to stand up on a board. In fact, I couldn't think of anything more uncool than me trying to stand on a board! BUT - I do have an imagination, and I have seen enough people looking good on waves big and small. So what has surfing got to do with change?

I can imagine what it must be like to be surfing a wave. Once you are standing you need to be extremely flexible to keep your balance and to direct the board. I imagine you have your knees bent slightly and your body is ready to move in any direction in an instant. That kind of flexibility is what we need in life to cope with change. Change is all around us, we must be ready for it and be willing to move and be flexible in order to remain standing. Bill Rancic, winner of The Apprentice in 2004, describes this as agility. And he says perseverance is essential too.

But that's not all, oh no... (I think the Cat in the Hat said that, but that's another article completely). When you are on that surf board it is necessary to focus on what lies ahead. Being flexible in the moment is essential, but looking ahead is as important. On the wave you would be making decisions about how to best use the wave, to see where the wave is taking you. Are you heading for rocks? Is the wave going to dump you? Where do you want to ride on the wave, or should you take the decision to get off it and wait for another wave? Dealing with change in our lives is like this too. You have to be flexible in the moment, but also keep an eye on what lies ahead and make decisions that are best for you. It's about being prepared.

I like to try and practice what I preach. It's not always easy, but dealing with change requires that you can be flexible and be prepared. However, I think for now I'll practice standing on the bus without holding on rather than become part of the food chain!

Tree Huggers

The trouble with hugging a tree is that it tends to block your view of what's around you. Oh, I know it's environmentally friendly, and spiritually correct to hug trees these days, and I'm all for it. But I am cautious about becoming too attached to any one particular tree because sometimes it can be really hard to let go.

I've had client's tell me they do not want to change. "So....why are we having this conversation?"

"Ummm, I know what I'm doing is not the best for me, but if you can help me manage it better...."

"So, you want me to make you better at what you are doing, even though you realise it is not the best for you?"

"Is that ok?"

That's the problem with 'anger management' or any 'management' for that matter. Many people just want to know how to control or manage the problem better without addressing it directly or going through the tough experience of learning to do something differently. The expectation is that they can learn to be better at anger, they can learn to be a better abusive partner, or my personal favourite, be a better drunk.

Sometimes we are just not ready for change. It's a whole lot easier to hold on to what we know - and that's ok, it's a perfectly natural reaction. We go back to what we know. It's comfortable, and it is safe.

I've found that in many people's lives there comes a time when doing what we know just doesn't seem to work so well anymore. It's as if the rules have changed. In fact, doing more of what we know seems to be dragging us down. Real personal change at this time is about being self aware enough to notice this, to admit this, and then to open up to look for possibilities for doing something different.

At this point though we tend to find ourselves hugging the proverbial tree and therefore not being able to see the forest around us. Working with someone to explore the forest around you is a great idea. Just looking at ways to do things differently and being supported in your choices and the action you might take makes a huge difference to our ability to let go of the tree. The tree will always be there - you can stay close while you explore - and who knows what you might find when you let go.

Madonna's Dream

Many years ago I decided to find out more about Madonna because I wanted to learn about her career success. I must admit that today I do not remember too much about what she did or how she did it. What I do remember though, is that at some point she made a decision about her life. She had some kind of dream, and whether you agree or disagree with the result, the point is she decided to make a change.

I'm aware that so much is new and changing around me these days. People and products I'd never heard of 10 years ago are now part of my everyday language. Jacob Zuma leads the ANC, Barack Obama could soon make history, I talk to friends using skype and facebook, online dictionaries and wikipedia provide instant information, and my 11 year old can tell me what a Wii is (and I thought I knew all this time!).

Behind every new name and product you will find someone - yes, a real person -who has made a decision to put time, effort, and energy into making a change in their lives, and probably other people's lives as well. The change only happens because somebody has said "I'm going to do it". Change in your life does not have to be as public and world changing as my examples, it can be a private affair. It takes just a moment to commit to doing something differently and move towards creating an alternative future for your life. Madonna was an ordinary girl before she became a material girl. The change did not just happen. It was a decision she made.

Small Steps

If you were hungry enough to want to eat an elephant how would you do it? The answer of course is one bite at a time - even when the elephant in question is one of those delicious Cote D'or hazelnut filled choccies. Savour it, one bite at a time.

A client I worked with today reminded me that real and meaningful change in his life can only come about by focusing on small steps towards achieving what he wants. So often we are taken in by the big picture; how we should look, what we want to achieve, what our family should be like, that we focus all our attention on achieving that. But putting all our energy into creating what we want instantly can end up ruining all our attempts to achieve something new. At some point the task just seems too big or unachievable and we put it on the back burner for a while. And we start to think things about ourselves and our ability - often along the lines of 'I'm not good enough' or 'I can't do this' or 'If I can't even do this then why should I try anything?'

So what changes are you contemplating in your life? Take what you want to achieve and break it into smaller more manageable steps. Get some help to do this if necessary. And then work on achieving the small steps, rewarding yourself all the way. With Cote D'or chocolate elephants if that's your passion!

Death and Taxes

When I was about 10 years old I remember a wise adult informing me that there are just two things in life that are constant; death and taxes. And boy, were they right. Now that I've added 70kg and a receding hairline to my repertoire these two aspects of life seem be pretty constant alright. Unavoidable in fact.

But you know, I've realised that in this time I seem to have added a third constant to that list; and that would be change. These days we also have to regard change as a constant in our lives. It's all around us, all the time. It is the air that we breath.

Not that change wasn't always there. It was. There was just more time to deal with it. There were deadlines to meet, as there are today, but can you imagine that the fax machine was still 8 years from popularity. How on earth did anyone do anything in those days? The pace of life and business was less demanding, jobs still held a long term promise, and the need to change was less frequent.

One thing this century demands of us is that we accept change as a constant in our lives, and in doing that, learn to manage it successfully for ourselves. In the same way, I guess, that we come to terms (sometimes grudgingly) with managing the reality of death and taxes. We must pay attention to these things and prepare ourselves, or risk being taken by surprise.

Doing change

If you and I have ever met professionally chances are it's been about change. This literally dawned on me (at 6am this morning) as my brain unconsciously answered a question I've been asking for days - what do all my client's have in common? The answer: they all want change in their lives. That simple.

Most of them didn't ask for it though. Most of us are quite happy getting on with our lives, doing what we've always done. And then, slowly over time, or in a moment, we realise that something has changed. Things are not as comfortable anymore. By the time I meet my client they have usually been trying everything they know to make things right. The trouble is I do not remember learning about change as a subject at school. It's one of those areas of life, like stress, that we are expected to be able to handle. And if we struggle it says something about our character.

In my experience I've learned that there are ways of dealing with change in life that are more effective than others. I've also made it my job to know how to help people to cope with change. Usually this has been when they are no longer able to do it by themselves and they are needing support and guidance to move forward. And while I work well in this situation I have always wondered what it would be like for this person if they had learned different skills earlier in life, skills that might have allowed them to do something differently, to think alternatively, to avoid this place that they now find themselves.

So, in the hope of meeting you earlier on the road, I will be filling these spaces with thoughts and ideas about being ready for change and dealing with change in ways that keep you in control. And if I can help you smile and enjoy yourself at the same time then I'll be having fun too.