Many years ago I decided to find out more about Madonna because I wanted to learn about her career success. I must admit that today I do not remember too much about what she did or how she did it. What I do remember though, is that at some point she made a decision about her life. She had some kind of dream, and whether you agree or disagree with the result, the point is she decided to make a change.
I'm aware that so much is new and changing around me these days. People and products I'd never heard of 10 years ago are now part of my everyday language. Jacob Zuma leads the ANC, Barack Obama could soon make history, I talk to friends using skype and facebook, online dictionaries and wikipedia provide instant information, and my 11 year old can tell me what a Wii is (and I thought I knew all this time!).
Behind every new name and product you will find someone - yes, a real person -who has made a decision to put time, effort, and energy into making a change in their lives, and probably other people's lives as well. The change only happens because somebody has said "I'm going to do it". Change in your life does not have to be as public and world changing as my examples, it can be a private affair. It takes just a moment to commit to doing something differently and move towards creating an alternative future for your life. Madonna was an ordinary girl before she became a material girl. The change did not just happen. It was a decision she made.
Monday, March 24, 2008
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Small Steps
If you were hungry enough to want to eat an elephant how would you do it? The answer of course is one bite at a time - even when the elephant in question is one of those delicious Cote D'or hazelnut filled choccies. Savour it, one bite at a time.
A client I worked with today reminded me that real and meaningful change in his life can only come about by focusing on small steps towards achieving what he wants. So often we are taken in by the big picture; how we should look, what we want to achieve, what our family should be like, that we focus all our attention on achieving that. But putting all our energy into creating what we want instantly can end up ruining all our attempts to achieve something new. At some point the task just seems too big or unachievable and we put it on the back burner for a while. And we start to think things about ourselves and our ability - often along the lines of 'I'm not good enough' or 'I can't do this' or 'If I can't even do this then why should I try anything?'
So what changes are you contemplating in your life? Take what you want to achieve and break it into smaller more manageable steps. Get some help to do this if necessary. And then work on achieving the small steps, rewarding yourself all the way. With Cote D'or chocolate elephants if that's your passion!
A client I worked with today reminded me that real and meaningful change in his life can only come about by focusing on small steps towards achieving what he wants. So often we are taken in by the big picture; how we should look, what we want to achieve, what our family should be like, that we focus all our attention on achieving that. But putting all our energy into creating what we want instantly can end up ruining all our attempts to achieve something new. At some point the task just seems too big or unachievable and we put it on the back burner for a while. And we start to think things about ourselves and our ability - often along the lines of 'I'm not good enough' or 'I can't do this' or 'If I can't even do this then why should I try anything?'
So what changes are you contemplating in your life? Take what you want to achieve and break it into smaller more manageable steps. Get some help to do this if necessary. And then work on achieving the small steps, rewarding yourself all the way. With Cote D'or chocolate elephants if that's your passion!
Monday, March 17, 2008
Death and Taxes
When I was about 10 years old I remember a wise adult informing me that there are just two things in life that are constant; death and taxes. And boy, were they right. Now that I've added 70kg and a receding hairline to my repertoire these two aspects of life seem be pretty constant alright. Unavoidable in fact.
But you know, I've realised that in this time I seem to have added a third constant to that list; and that would be change. These days we also have to regard change as a constant in our lives. It's all around us, all the time. It is the air that we breath.
Not that change wasn't always there. It was. There was just more time to deal with it. There were deadlines to meet, as there are today, but can you imagine that the fax machine was still 8 years from popularity. How on earth did anyone do anything in those days? The pace of life and business was less demanding, jobs still held a long term promise, and the need to change was less frequent.
One thing this century demands of us is that we accept change as a constant in our lives, and in doing that, learn to manage it successfully for ourselves. In the same way, I guess, that we come to terms (sometimes grudgingly) with managing the reality of death and taxes. We must pay attention to these things and prepare ourselves, or risk being taken by surprise.
But you know, I've realised that in this time I seem to have added a third constant to that list; and that would be change. These days we also have to regard change as a constant in our lives. It's all around us, all the time. It is the air that we breath.
Not that change wasn't always there. It was. There was just more time to deal with it. There were deadlines to meet, as there are today, but can you imagine that the fax machine was still 8 years from popularity. How on earth did anyone do anything in those days? The pace of life and business was less demanding, jobs still held a long term promise, and the need to change was less frequent.
One thing this century demands of us is that we accept change as a constant in our lives, and in doing that, learn to manage it successfully for ourselves. In the same way, I guess, that we come to terms (sometimes grudgingly) with managing the reality of death and taxes. We must pay attention to these things and prepare ourselves, or risk being taken by surprise.
Sunday, March 16, 2008
Doing change
If you and I have ever met professionally chances are it's been about change. This literally dawned on me (at 6am this morning) as my brain unconsciously answered a question I've been asking for days - what do all my client's have in common? The answer: they all want change in their lives. That simple.
Most of them didn't ask for it though. Most of us are quite happy getting on with our lives, doing what we've always done. And then, slowly over time, or in a moment, we realise that something has changed. Things are not as comfortable anymore. By the time I meet my client they have usually been trying everything they know to make things right. The trouble is I do not remember learning about change as a subject at school. It's one of those areas of life, like stress, that we are expected to be able to handle. And if we struggle it says something about our character.
In my experience I've learned that there are ways of dealing with change in life that are more effective than others. I've also made it my job to know how to help people to cope with change. Usually this has been when they are no longer able to do it by themselves and they are needing support and guidance to move forward. And while I work well in this situation I have always wondered what it would be like for this person if they had learned different skills earlier in life, skills that might have allowed them to do something differently, to think alternatively, to avoid this place that they now find themselves.
So, in the hope of meeting you earlier on the road, I will be filling these spaces with thoughts and ideas about being ready for change and dealing with change in ways that keep you in control. And if I can help you smile and enjoy yourself at the same time then I'll be having fun too.
Most of them didn't ask for it though. Most of us are quite happy getting on with our lives, doing what we've always done. And then, slowly over time, or in a moment, we realise that something has changed. Things are not as comfortable anymore. By the time I meet my client they have usually been trying everything they know to make things right. The trouble is I do not remember learning about change as a subject at school. It's one of those areas of life, like stress, that we are expected to be able to handle. And if we struggle it says something about our character.
In my experience I've learned that there are ways of dealing with change in life that are more effective than others. I've also made it my job to know how to help people to cope with change. Usually this has been when they are no longer able to do it by themselves and they are needing support and guidance to move forward. And while I work well in this situation I have always wondered what it would be like for this person if they had learned different skills earlier in life, skills that might have allowed them to do something differently, to think alternatively, to avoid this place that they now find themselves.
So, in the hope of meeting you earlier on the road, I will be filling these spaces with thoughts and ideas about being ready for change and dealing with change in ways that keep you in control. And if I can help you smile and enjoy yourself at the same time then I'll be having fun too.
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